The Measure of a Mom
Stop what you are doing. I want you to think of 2 Moms who are better than you and 2 who are worse than you.
Did you think of them surprisingly quick?
What makes them better or worse than you?
Growing up I did not face too many insecurities - I knew who I was and what I was good at. But when I journeyed into motherhood I was overwhelmed with insecurities.
Where did these insecurities come from? Honestly, the opinions and advice from others. All of the sudden my life and choices were an open discussion for everyone I came in contact with.
Breastfed or bottle-fed? Co-sleeping? You LET her cry? She can't be warm enough in those clothes!
Lord.
Although I know most people who were pouring into my circumstances meant well - it was not what I needed.
I didn't need someone to tell me "Oh, I know that's hard - I've been there and it gets better".
I needed someone to just tell me "Oh, I know that's hard. Tell me more"
I needed someone to sit in my misery with me and let me complain for a little while until I was done.
As women we have a predisposition to measure ourselves against other women. I don't know the scientific facts to prove that but I know that it is true. When we meet another women we subconsciously measure ourselves against them.
Are they prettier than us?
Are they married and we are? (If we are married and they aren't we get more points!)
Are they successful in their jobs? Etc.
And I hate to tell you but when you become a mom it gets worse. Thanks, Pinterest, Facebook, and Instagram.
Not only do we feel insecure in our abilities to keep a human alive without a manual, but now we get to see how others do it better than us through social media. Yay!
I have serious mom-fails daily where I'm reminded of my sinful nature. Just last week I got so frustrated with my sweet daughter who was screaming in pain from a double ear infection, refusing to eat. Was I patient with her? Nope. I threw the bottle at the wall. Not my best moment...
What would happen if we showed others who we really were? What would happen if we didn't feel the need to clean-up our houses before we let others in? I think we feel the need to clean before others come over because we want to hide our messes and not let people see our real lives.
Now, does that mean that I will not strive to keep a clean house? Absolutely not. I believe in my abilities to set an atmosphere of order in my household that promotes peace. But will I drive my house into anxiety by stressing over every piece of dirt brought in or crumbs dropped from sticky little hands? No.
Let's be real. Let's not measure ourselves against others but strive to be more like Jesus. He doesn't measure us against Himself, which He has every right to, so why should we compare?
Did you think of them surprisingly quick?
What makes them better or worse than you?
Growing up I did not face too many insecurities - I knew who I was and what I was good at. But when I journeyed into motherhood I was overwhelmed with insecurities.
Where did these insecurities come from? Honestly, the opinions and advice from others. All of the sudden my life and choices were an open discussion for everyone I came in contact with.
Breastfed or bottle-fed? Co-sleeping? You LET her cry? She can't be warm enough in those clothes!
Lord.
Although I know most people who were pouring into my circumstances meant well - it was not what I needed.
I didn't need someone to tell me "Oh, I know that's hard - I've been there and it gets better".
I needed someone to just tell me "Oh, I know that's hard. Tell me more"
I needed someone to sit in my misery with me and let me complain for a little while until I was done.
As women we have a predisposition to measure ourselves against other women. I don't know the scientific facts to prove that but I know that it is true. When we meet another women we subconsciously measure ourselves against them.
Are they prettier than us?
Are they married and we are? (If we are married and they aren't we get more points!)
Are they successful in their jobs? Etc.
And I hate to tell you but when you become a mom it gets worse. Thanks, Pinterest, Facebook, and Instagram.
Not only do we feel insecure in our abilities to keep a human alive without a manual, but now we get to see how others do it better than us through social media. Yay!
What would happen if we showed others who we really were? What would happen if we didn't feel the need to clean-up our houses before we let others in? I think we feel the need to clean before others come over because we want to hide our messes and not let people see our real lives.
Now, does that mean that I will not strive to keep a clean house? Absolutely not. I believe in my abilities to set an atmosphere of order in my household that promotes peace. But will I drive my house into anxiety by stressing over every piece of dirt brought in or crumbs dropped from sticky little hands? No.
Let's be real. Let's not measure ourselves against others but strive to be more like Jesus. He doesn't measure us against Himself, which He has every right to, so why should we compare?
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